Breakthrough.
so yesterday night nana and i were analyzing dance and i realised that i'm really off.
" it doesn't look bad, it just looks different. "
just like what tons of people have been telling me, i guess i'm just too bouncy. no control, no sharpness... it comes to a point that i feel exasperated because i don't understand my body and i don know how to. and as much as i'd like to improve, explore new frontiers and just breakthrough, i don't want to end up motiff-ed. i can't quite find a word for it but this is as close as i can to getting to a comparison.
motiff-ed.
what could be my strength could end up as my weakness.
like looking into a mirror,
what could be my weakness could just be my strength as well.
that aside, i guess i'll wait just this while more , for a sign that's so in-my-face, if i were to tweak now, i know i'll lose everything.
behold the sloth, me.
once again i went on an insane sleeping spree. back home at 3 from under-the-block sessions, i went to bed at 4. woke up at 2, had "breakfast" and slept till 6. sigh that's like 14 hours. i think of the 8 hours of sleep i'm supposed to have and then the extra 6 which i wasted ): am such a horibly mean and insensitive creature when sleepy ): i'm always physically and verbally abusing cummy when he tries to wake me. it comes to a point that i'm actually quite afraid of sleeping over and camping because my agression while sleepy has increased at least 3-fold ):
" 私が知っているのに私はである少し困難これをのそれ終えるべきである。 私の中心は今2つの方法引っ張られる。 しかし私は中心の出来事に関しては自分自身を、私よく言うことがわかる自分自身の知っている。私は空の雲のように変わり、あなたのために残っているすべては傷つく。 私は実際にあなたが恋するべきである女の子ではない。" - 2 ways.
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